Beyond Your Fear

The cost of living in fear is great. Fear is the source of stress, anxiety, and procrastination. There is no joy when living in fear. It feels heavy and burdensome to be worried and concerned, to be unable to relax, paralyzed, to hold back from doing what you want to do, what you know you can do

There are many fears that keep us living small, shallow lives: fear of happiness, success, failure, making mistakes, being insignificant, not being good enough or not having enough. You may fear not being liked, being controlled or losing control, not being loved or lovable, being alone or being abandoned. Whatever your fear, it permeates every fiber of your being and impacts your life in a myriad of ways.

Fear is based on a thought, a perception of your mind from your lifes experiences and from your expectations which are also based on thought. When you allow your mind to wander in thought through the fear, you are taken on a ride through fantasy land of the worst possible scenarios of what could happen if you act. This only serves to intensify the fear causing anxiety, worry, and feelings of impending doom. By learning to unearth your fears and challenge them, you can choose new, supportive thoughts and take different actions. You can choose to act in spite of feeling fear and learn to control the thoughts that have you fantasize worst-case scenarios; you dont have to go there. That way, YOU are in charge of your thoughts, of the experience you have even in the privacy of your own mind. You dont have to experience that heightened level of anxiety and all the drama that leads to inertia. You can choose a different inner experience that leads you to success and happiness.

Fear as Motivator and as Suppressor Fear is one of the greatest motivators and one of the greatest suppressors. As a motivator, fear forces you to act or to not act. Either way, you are not at choice but rather, you act to avoid what you perceive to be painful. Many people use fear as a tool to motivate or control others; it is a leadership style. This leadership style reduces productivity by stifling creativity and innovation of the person being controlled. Fearful of speaking up and sharing ideas, the employee keeps his ideas to himself. This leader often is disliked and although he may be effective at producing results, morale is usually poor. Unfortunately, this leader does not understand the impact his behavior is having on others and is completely unaware that he is operating from fear himself.

At home, parents can wield fear as well, creating uncomfortable environments which not only stifles the growth of our youth but can lead to depression, anxiety, addiction or suicidal thoughts. As spouses, fear creates hostile environments. You dont feel safe to be yourself. Youre always worried about what you do or say. Living on eggshells all the time takes a tremendous amount of energy. This might be why you stay late at work and spend your days wishing life were different.